Post 95: How To: Talk to Strangers

I figured it was about time that I posted something new, and it seemed like a fitting topic considering where I am. Where am I, you ask? I am sitting in a Biology 100 class, that I am not register in, surrounded almost entirely by strangers. Not that I will be talking to any of the at this point. I look like I am taking notes right now, so I am not distracting anyone. Talking to anyone would mostly likely cause a distraction.

However, it helped inspire this topic.

Talking to strangers is easy, in theory. But, there are a lot of things that are easy in theory. Like cooking. Or straightening your hair.  Or driving a car.  Or riding a bike.

But the number of bicycle accidents per year alone should tell you that nothing is ever as easy as it seems, except breathing. Although, Biology students might disagree (if you want to get technical about it). 

So, how do you talk to strangers? Or rather, how do you start up a conversation? 

Find a common interest, sounds easy enough, but how do you out get to this point?

There are lots of ways to get there but the easiest way requires you to be observant. 

What is the person wearing? Do they have a shirt with a band name or tv show on it? Do they have really cute boots on? Are they carrying an umbrella?

Make note of these things. 

If they are wearing a band shirt and you like the band, there you go. You have something to talk about. So, you might want to start with,  "are you a _______ fan?" This would also work if their shirt or backpack is paraphernalia for a TV show. 

If they are not advertising anything in particular, find something they are wearing that you like. (This might be an easier tip for women to use, as far as I know. I am not a guy, so I can't be sure.) 

Then once you find something, tell them that you like it. They might mumble a simple 'thanks'. But, sometimes, this is really all it will take because they will start telling you more about it and where they got it. If they don't, feel free to ask. 

Ask them where they got it. If you've been to the store, say so. The point is to find something in common. Once you find something in common, it becomes easier to keep the conversation going.

If you are in classes with them or know that they are a student, ask them about their classes. Inevitably they will have something to say. You can ask what year they are in, what their major is, what they want to be once they graduate. 

It is important to note that these people may not want to talk. So, if you are asking questions and they are not really eager to answer, are giving short answers, and/or aren't asking questions back they could be trying to let you know that they don't really feel like talking, at least not with you. 

So that's it. That is how you talk to strangers. I mean, once you get past any awkwardness or feeling of anxiety. I am sort of an extrovert, so I can't claim to fully understand how an introvert feels in these situations. But, I think, that this will work for both the outgoing person and shy person alike.