Post 82: Need vs. Want

Need versus want, a common dilemma. One that someone always faces. Mostly, I think it is heard about these days in shopping malls. "I need that purse", "I need new shoes", etc. But, need used to mean something that a person could not do without. You can do without a new pair of shoes, assuming that you have any shoes at all. And no one really needs a purse. I went years with only pockets.

Yet, we imply we need something when we want it enough.

I am facing it right now. I need something, except not really. I just really, really want it.

For school, of course. I really, really (I mean, REALLY) want to take this class. It is a class I am sure I would enjoy and learn from.

Except it goes until 9:30pm. On a good day, during normal bus hours, it takes me between two hours and an hour and a half to get home. Except after 8, the bus only comes every hour. So, if the first bus I take is late (which it usually is) and I miss the 10:08pm bus, then I have one shot at getting home on the 11:08pm bus. And then, I won't get home until at least 11:45pm. I have also gone to take the later buses when returning from movies with friends and the like and had it not come at all. By 10pm, my mom is usually asleep too. So, I will have no way to get home.

Short of a cab. Or, I could take a different bus to a different bus and then walk a half mile through woods and dark streets.  Still, no matter which way it plays out- I end up at home around midnight.

But, I really want to take this class and who knows when it will be available again. Then again, you have to submit an 8-page, prose portfolio in less than a month. That isn't much time. Plus, what if I submit it, and then still don't get in? That would be a little bit...depressing.

I don't even know what it is they're looking for. It just says 8-page prose portfolio. I mean, usually portfolio's imply collections of things when used like this. However, it doesn't specify if that is the case here. Or if they want an 8-page short story. Or 8 individual one page samples of writing. Or 2 four page essays.

I sent an email to the head of the English department asking what was meant by that. I haven't heard back yet.

This class is also four hours long. Technically, it is a two hour lecture followed by a two hour seminar, but that is still a really long time that late at night.

I don't really need to take this class, even taking it down from a life or death need to a for school need. I could take a different class. There are a number available that would fill the same requirement, but this class just appeals to me so much. I love writing, as you can tell from my blogging habits and stories about telling stories.

Most of my schools didn't have creative writing classes and the one high school that did, had limited availability and always conflicted with my schedule. I only ever took one creative writing class and it was online. It was great. I was the youngest person in the class, but it was never apparent. I would love to take a class where I could actually interact with other writing enthusiast and engage with the Professor.

I am going to try and get in. I don't know if when we send in the 'portfolio' we will hear back about whether or not we can join, or if it is just a formality.

I guess time will tell.