Post 107: Revolving Door of Men

That sounds like a really provocative title. Or just a very strange one. This post will be an internal debate between myself and myself, over a fictional character's love life. Whose to say who will win such an equally matched debate?


On the one side, I will be arguing the commonly held opinion that the main character should have ended up with one of the three men in her life. On the other side, I will argue that none of them were really right for her, so it was better she didn't end up with any of them.

The character: Lorelai (Rory) Gilmore. Men: Dean, Jess, and Logan. (Not including any of the potential love interests that didn't make it to boyfriend status: like Tristan or Marty).

She should have ended up with Dean. He was kind to her. He always loved her, even after getting married. Two out of the three times they broke up, it was only because he felt insecure and didn't think he was good enough for her. This showed how much he thought of her. He was also more supportive than either of her other two love's and he got along with her mother.

She should not have ended up with Dean because even though he loved her his insecurities lead to them breaking up twice. And the main reason he didn't think he was good enough for her, was because he kind of wasn't. He didn't go to college, or he did but then dropped out, he talked about going and then suggested he couldn't go to class and then it didn't come up. He married someone else, who he didn't love. He cheated on his wife, multiple times. And even though he told Rory that he would have left his wife if she hadn't found out about the fair, he had shown no indications of that so I'm pretty sure that he wouldn't have. He bailed on Rory twice. He used his little sister to try and break her and her boyfriend up. Meanwhile, she was a straight-A student who got into all three Ivy league Universities she applied to. She wanted to be a journalist and see the world. He wanted to get married and have a kid. There is nothing wrong with what he wanted to do, but he would have either held her back or they would have broken up because he would get too paranoid about her not being home all the time.

She should have ended up with Jess. He loved her. They had a lot of the same interests. He was kind to her. They had really good chemistry together. Even though she was with Dean he still went out of his way for her. He even came back several times in the show and said he still loved her. He was the one in the end that helped her see straight and helped snap her back to her old self after she dropped out of Yale.

He was horribly rude to her mother and, basically, everyone else in town. He was a partier and even though he was smart, maybe even as smart as she was, he ditched so many classes he didn't even graduate high school. And the only reason that he did things for her, the only reason that he was nice when she was with Dean, was to steal her from Dean. He literally told her that the only reason he participated in the town events was to win her over and that now that they were together he had no reason to go anymore. He then bailed on her for prom and left town without giving her any notice. When he showed up again he avoided her, told her he loved her and then bailed again. He didn't take her feelings into consideration, he only tried to force his own on her. He did seem to mature through the final seasons, however, he still has things he needs to do in order to get himself and his life in order. If she were to end up with any of the three, he seems like the best in the later seasons, but not for a  few more years after the show.

She should have ended up with Logan. He was like a mix of Dean and Jess. He was nice like Dean, but he was adventurous and smart like Jess. He loved her. He changed to try to be with her. He was supportive of her and encouraged her to live her life to the fullest.


And he was also a jerk. Perhaps even worse than Jess because he was two-faced. This was most thoroughly demonstrated when he first officially met Rory's grandparents and he stole something from them. He sat around joking with them then stole something that had value to them. The maid was almost fired, possibly to be arrested as well, because of his actions but it wasn't until Rory's mother demanded he hand it over that he gave it back. Rory didn't say anything either. She knew he had it and that a woman was about to be fired for his actions, but said nothing. He was a poor influence on her. He was the one she stole a boat with. He was the one that led to her dropping out of Yale. He is the one that got her into trouble on multiple occasions. He let her drop everything she had ever wanted and he supported her only in the sense that he did nothing at all. He didn't try to help her. Plus, he cheated on her. They were taking some time apart and he slept with or "fooled around" with at least four women. (If you have seen Friends, you will know about the "we were on a break!" plot, which is also used here.)  He later started to act like a jerk after losing a large amount of money. He went partying and went to Vegas instead of being a mature adult and dealing with it. The only reason she forgave him for this is because he injured himself. He didn't actually learn a lesson, she was just so scared of losing him that she felt guilty he almost died when they were fighting. In the end, he gave her an ultimatum, "marry me or we're through", on her graduation day. So, he broke up with her on what was supposed to be one of the happiest days of her life. And only shortly after he basically proved that he was still as reckless and haphazard with his life and other people's money as he had ever been. 

It was good that she didn't end up with any of the guys because on multiple occasions she let a guy lead her away from her dreams. In the very first episode, she wants to back out of going to Chilton so she has more of a chance to be with a guy, a guy she had ONE conversation with (literally, one. He says sorry she is leaving and that he noticed her around, and she is ready to throw away something she'd been working like crazy for). This same guy is the one who later pulls her into having an affair with him, even though he was only recently married. She then tries to DEFEND what he did, because he was "her's". She dated other people since and treated him horribly, he moved on and got married but he was "her's".

She treats Dean horribly because of Jess. She gets into her most serious fights with her mother of Dean. She becomes a homewrecker and ruins her reputation in town because of Dean. She is partially responsible for Jess crashing his car into a store front, hurting herself and ruining the storefront. She ditches school because of Jess. She misses her mother's graduation because of Jess. She drops out of Yale because of things that happened with Logan. She steals a boat with Logan. She jumps of a high place because Logan asks her to. She treats her friend badly because of Logan. She lies to her closest friends because of Marty, a guy she wasn't even dating.

In the entire show from the time she turned 16, she was never really single for very long.She needs to go and live, and be single for awhile. Even when she was single, there were always guys around who wanted to be with her (Marty, for example). It will be good for her to be unattached during the time after the show when she goes to travel the world and write about everything she sees. She can learn to be more independent so when the right guy comes along (whether he be a previous love interest or a new one) she can be in a relationship with them without sacrificing what she has worked so hard for.